“sorry, can you make that gluten free?”

an essay that is certified gluten free and gut approved

you’d never think that going gluten free was actually from my own free will. most other gluten free people i know describe their experience of going the GF route like they had a gun pointed to their head while they’re crying about losing sourdough bread. y’all believe it or not it’s not that bad, but it did take a while to get there.

it all started off with my gut. no, not the “foopah”. my actual gut, my cute little stomach. i was a wheat whore. pasta was tri-weekly, pizza was at least twice a month, and breaded chicken or cauliflower was a house staple, and dont even get me started on bread, but then i noticed the bloating. i knew i was a smidge husky but not that huksy. so i did what any other nineteen year old would do and google searched “why am i bloated”. don’t search that of course it said cancer. but as you scroll down past the sponsored google results you can come across one about food sensitivities.

“huh. okay”

im scrolling and scrolling and i see:

wheat, wheat, wheat, more wheat, dairy, gluten. what the f**k is gluten?

at this point i think i was too disheartened to even look up what gluten was, but i had made the executive decision that it was time to cut it out, along with dairy.

“this should be easy how hard can it be to not eat bread or dairy, there’s alternatives now that aren’t too bad”

boy was naive. when you first go gluten free, you have no idea that there is gluten in so much crap. soy sauce has gluten, most alcohol has gluten, dairy alternatives have gluten, certain sauces have flour thrown in. it was every other day i was accidentally cheating on my self-prescribed gluten free diet. but then i went to see my nutritionist. it got worse. not only was i not just sensitive to gluten and dairy, but ALLERGIC, along with nightshade vegetables (literally look up the category i can’t go down that rabbit hole), refined vegetable oils, and a variety of environmental things. god, i was going to be one of those plastic bubble kids.

but i couldn’t lose hope. luckily, i was working at a food establishment serving healthy bowls and smoothies, so at least i knew i would be okay there. i really started keeping track of what i ate. the fridge became canyon bakehouse bread, daiya cheese, and almond flour bags out the wazoo. suddenly it didn’t feel all that bad. i was experiementing with how to substitute some of my favorite dishes with the new alternatives i had to work with. i felt like a damn chemist! can i say that in my beginning stages all of it came out perfectly and i was eating like the queen of france? absolutely the f**k not most of the meals came out like hot garbage... but i was learning!

i’ll admit i was managing pretty well. was i that b**ch going up to the register and calling to ask for gluten free options? oh yes. did i get the stank eye? one hundred percent. did i give a shit? no. i shall explain why. in the little bit that i had really been strict on myself, you would be amazed the changes i saw physically in my body, but also internally. the bloated dropped off. the skinny queen had come out and she was here to stay. not only did look good, but i felt good. it was like i was on cloud nine and i didn’t even need my morning coffee to get there.

instagram @rather.be.eating.food
email @serenaauriel@gmail.com

*if someone from eater or the infatuation sees this, please hire me

places to go, food to eat

holbox

all time

sticky rice

highly likley